Driving Equality

Fred Phelps’ clan is coming to Vermont to protest the first day of legal same-sex marriages in the state!

The “God Hates Fags” Westboro Baptist Church is planning to picket the Vermont State House and City Clerk’s office in an attempt to spread their hate on this joyous day.

The Westboro Baptist Church wrote on their website, “God Hates Fags, and God Hates VT! Vermont is known for one thing primarily in this day and age (no not the beautiful scenery, not the quiet quaint towns, not the Maple Syrup). They are the most “gay” friendly spot in DOOMED america.” Fred Phelps and his group travel all across the United States spreading their message of hate and lies about lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people.

However, when the Phelps group comes to Vermont to protest LGBT equality, they will actually be raising money to promote LGBT equality!

Driving Equality is hosting a Phelps-A-Thon to counter Fred Phelps’ hateful message. For every minute the “God Hates Fags” clan is protesting, we will be collecting donations for the Driving Equality project, a trek around the country, to every state, in an effort to collect personal stories form LGBT folks and our allies. Telling our personal stories is the way we will win our fight for equality. (Pledge Online)

The Phelps clan will be protesting at the capital in Montpelier from 7:55 AM to 9:00 AM on September 1st. You can pledge any amount you chose, whether it be $0.25, $0.50, $1, or even $2 for every minute they protest. You can even pledge a flat rate for the entire time the group will be demonstrating. (Pledge Online)

The point of this Phelps-A-Thon is two fold. First, we are using Phelps’ own hateful message to raise funds for a good cause, one that will help counter the lies that are being spread about LGBT people. Second, after the event, we will send Phelps a thank you card, telling him how much money he raised for LGBT equality. This will certainly upset the group and it is possible that they will stop protesting in order to stop our fundraising.

Driving Equality and the Westboro Baptist Church are similar in their missions. WBC travels the country to promote their message of hatred of gays and lesbians. Driving Equality also travels the country, but our message is one of love and acceptance for gays and lesbians. We will continue to combat the hatred and lies beings spread by WBC.

During the 107 day trek across the United States, I stopped in Topeka, Kansas to visit the Westboro Baptist Church and sit down for a conversation with Shirley Phelps, the daughter or Fred Phelps and new leader of the group.

On the “God Hates Fags” website, Phelps has this to say about the upcoming protest at the school:

“God Hates Fags, and God Hates VT! 115 State St Vermont is known for one thing primarily in this day and age (no not the beautiful scenery, not the quiet quaint towns, not the Maple Syrup). They are the most “gay” friendly spot in DOOMED america. That is a great shame on this state and their State House. We must preach to them, and advise them of their impending doom. Psalm 50:22 Now consider this, ye that forget God, lest I tear you in pieces, and there be none to deliver. Your turned that state over to the fags, now your children come home in body bags! Next you will eat those children with your false gods and your filthy manner of life. That is correct, it will not be hard for you to be immediately besieged, and when that happens Vermont will eat their babies! AMEN!

Quit Enabling Sin, $ lovers! 39 Main Street Turning the state of Vermont over to the fags may seem like a sound financial decision what with the poor economy and all, but YOU know what the Lord God said about money, the love of money and the hurtfulness of covetousness – correct? Oh sure you do! So, what do you think will come of all of that? I will re-tell you what King Solomon told you before on this subject, to wit: Ecclesiastes 5:9 Moreover the profit of the earth is for all: the king himself is served by the field. 10 He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this is also vanity. 11 When goods increase, they are increased that eat them: and what good is there to the owners thereof, saving the beholding of them with their eyes? 12 The sleep of a labouring man is sweet, whether he eat little or much: but the abundance of the rich will not suffer him to sleep. 13 There is a sore evil which I have seen under the sun, namely, riches kept for the owners thereof to their hurt. 14 But those riches perish by evil travail: and he begetteth a son, and there is nothing in his hand. 15 As he came forth of his mother’s womb, naked shall he return to go as he came, and shall take nothing of his labour, which he may carry away in his hand. 16 And this also is a sore evil, that in all points as he came, so shall he go: and what profit hath he that hath laboured for the wind? 17 All his days also he eateth in darkness, and he hath much sorrow and wrath with his sickness. Now if that does not describe these sick, disgusting fags and their enablers – what does? Meantime, God mocks DOOMED america and detestible Vermont for catering to the flesh of their citizens and forgetting God in all their ways and works. The Beast Obama will not hesitate to bankrupt each state in this union. When you see this, DOOMED vermont, you better start stock piling those babies – for those will be your meals. Praise God for HIS Judgments. AMEN!”

We can turn these hateful words into positive change.

I learned of the passing of Senator Ted Kennedy late last night. A hole grew in my chest and a lump in my throat. I started crying uncontrollably. He was not a family relative or a close friend. But he has been my senator since the moment I entered this world. It hurts to lose a hero.

In 2006, I was holding signs in support of marriage equality outside the Massachusetts Democratic State Convention. Ted Kennedy was running for re-election. I kept asking when he was going to be speaking. I got a call from inside the building that he was about to take the stage. I begged and pleaded with another marriage equality supporter to let me have his pass to get inside the building. I made it in and watched Ted speak from high up about the convention floor. He spoke about his vision for America: healthcare for all, fair pay, peace, equality for gays and lesbians. I stood there and cried as I listened. What he stood for is what I stand for. It is not so much about politics as it is about doing what we believe is right. It’s about making the world a better place for those who will come next.

That November I had the honor of voting for my hero, Senator Ted Kennedy. I took this picture of my ballot while in the booth:

Today is a sad day. As we mourn the loss of a great leader, let’s commit to continuing the fight for what is right. There would be no greater tribute than for this country to pass comprehensive healthcare reform. I would call it the Edward M. Kennedy Universal Healthcare Reform Act, and it would cover everyone living in this country.

The struggle for fairness, justice, and equality will go on. Ted Kennedy has passed away, but The Dream Will Never Die.

Day 107

I made it home safe and sound today. It feels good to be back in Cambridge. I am thinking about what my next steps will be. It will take some time to process the trip and adjust to being home.

You can help out the Driving Equality project by donating to the New Computer Fund. I need to raise $1700 more to purchase the computer. This computer will be used to edit the final documentary.

Day 106

I am on the home stretch today, driving from Buffalo, New York to central Massachusetts. I will spend the night at my parent’s house in Lunenburg, Massachusetts, before completing the journey and returning home to Cambridge, the city I started in 106 days ago. It is hard to believe that I’m almost home after over three months on the road.

Day 105

My trip is almost over. I drove to Buffalo, New York last night, and then decided to cross the border in Canada. The Canadian border guard asked me what I was doing with the film equipment. I told him that I was making a documentary about gay rights in the United States. He asked, “for or against?”

I told him, “for.” He smiled approvingly, but sent me to have the van search in “secondary.” Readers of this blog will know that this is the sixth time the van has been searched. I have made it very clear that I strongly oppose illegal searches of my vehicle. I should also note that I am more than happy to comply with legal searches, such as this one at the national border. During the search of the van, I had to go in and speak with a woman from Customs. She asked what I was doing. I told her that I am driving around the US making a documentary about gay rights. She replied, “You know it’s legal here!”

Realizing that she was referring to same-sex marriage, I responded with my typical, “yah! That’s awesome!. She was excited and proud of her country. It was awesome.

I hung out in Niagara Falls today and performed my duties as a tourist to the best of my ability. This place is pretty incredible.

Day 104

I was in Cleveland, Ohio today at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Community Center of Greater Cleveland. I had the pleasure to meet with Sue Doerfer, the Director of the Center. We talked about what it is like to be LGBT in Ohio, the need for a Center, and the city of Cleveland. Ohio does not have any legal protections for LGBT folks, but the city of Cleveland is trying to make up for that. The city just created a Domestic Partnership registry. Couples can register as partners, making their relationships official in the eyes of the city. However, because the state and federal governments do not recognize the Domestic Partnerships, no legal rights are gained.

I was quite impressed with the work going on at the Center. While I was there, a bunch of young people came in to use computers and relax in the safe environment. I wish every city, large and small, had an LGBT community center.

Day 103

After leaving Indiana, I headed to Kalamazoo, Michigan. This is a great city with a great name. There is much ado in Kalamazoo. The city recently passed a local ordinance outlawing discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. The state of Michigan does not protect LGBT folks from workplace or housing discrimination, but a few cities do have local ordinances.

After Kalamazoo passed their ordinance, a group of anti-gay folks created an organization called, Kalamazoo Citizens Voting No to Special Rights Discrimination (yes, that is actually the organization’s official name). This group is working to repeal the new law banning discrimination. They have collected enough signatures to put the measure on the ballot this November.

In response to the anti-gay campaign, a new organization, One Kalamazoo, has stepped up to protect the law. I was able to interview a few of the folks involved in the fight. First up, I met with Thomas Seiler of the Kalamazoo Gay and Lesbian Resource Center. He told me about some of the work the resource center does in the area. Next, I interviewed Terry Kuseske, a longtime gay activist and candidate for Kalamazoo City Commission. We talked about the work that lead up to the passage of the non-discrimination ordinance.

Then I spoke with Jon Hoadley, the Campaign Manager for One Kalamazoo. We went over the ways in which our side will win this war. (I have a thing for alliteration.) Next, I met with Adam Taylor, GLBT activist, campaign manager, media specialist, and Director of Project Light; an organization he founded to help combat the epidemic of queer youth suicide. Adam and I had a great conversation about the way homophobia puts youth at risk.

Then I met with Amy Hunter, Director of Operations for One Kalamazoo. She told me about the protections afforded in the new law and what it is like to be transgender in Michigan. Last, but not least, I spoke with Steve Gerike about gay life in Kalamazoo. Special thanks to Steve for inviting me to the city many months ago when he first learned of Driving Equality.

Kalamazoo is one of the places we need to be turning our energy to this year. Our rights are on the ballot here this November. We aren’t even talking about marriage rights, but very basic civil rights like employment and housing. Let’s try to help out Kalamazoo. Check out OneKalamazoo.com.

Again, I’m trying to post a video clip of the interview, but my computer is not feeling it. You can help out the Driving Equality project by donating to the New Computer Fund. I need to raise $1700 more to purchase the computer. This computer will be used to edit the final documentary.

Day 102

I was in Indiana this morning, interviewing Nancy and Hank of the Michiana Chapter of PFLAG. We met in the new GLBT Center, located in South Bend. They told me about the climate LGBT people face in Northern Indiana. There are no legal protects for LGBT folks in this state.

Nancy and Hank are doing the work that needs to be done. They are both straight allies with gay family members. I was inspired by all the effort they put into supporting the local LGBT community.

I was completely exhausted when I met Nancy and Hank because the Indiana State Police had kept me up until 4:00 AM illegally searching my vehicle. Special thanks to Nancy and Hank for letting me take a nap at their house after the interview.

Again, I’m trying to post a video clip of the interview, but my computer is not feeling it. You can help out the Driving Equality project by donating to the New Computer Fund. I need to raise $1700 more to purchase the computer. This computer will be used to edit the final documentary.

I was unconstitutionally searched again today. This is the fifth search of the van and the third illegal search. This experience has left me feeling small, powerless, helpless, and deeply offended.

I was pulled over for speeding in Indiana. The officer said I was doing 77 in a 55. I thought the speed limit was 75, as it has been the last three months of my trip, so I apologized and took the ticket.

While the officer that pulled me over was in his car, running my vehicle and identity background check, another officer came to my side window. I rolled it down and we had a conversation. We talked about the Driving Equality project, gay rights, traveling, Yosemite, and filmmaking. He asked what I had in the van. I let him stick his head in the window and look in the back. This is not something I would normally do, but he had been polite so I allowed it.

We talked a little more. He asked me about the Buddha on my dashboard and who was funding the Driving Equality project. Then the first officer came to my window and handed me a ticket. I don’t know how much it will cost me. He told me that the court will mail me the actual citation. He handed me back my license and registration. That is when the other officer asked me if he could search the van. I said no and that I would like to get going. He asked if he could run his K-9 around the van. I said no again. He then told me to have a good night and that I was free to go. I started driving again.

I starting thinking about what I would write on this blog. How interesting it was that I had been asked by a police officer if he could search the van. I refused, and because he had neither probably cause or a warrant, he understood that he could not search the vehicle and actually let me be on my way. I was surprised, but uplifted by the experience. Maybe there are some good cops that actually do follow the law. Go America! Go 4th Amendment!

I drove for about 20 more minutes. It was 2:00AM and I was looking for a rest area to sleep for the night. As I was driving, about 15 minutes after I was pulled over, I saw a police car on the side of the road ahead of me. I was not worried because I wasn’t speeding. (The speed limit was 70 now). Yet, as I passed the police car, he turned on his headlights and started to follow me. He did not have his blue lights on, but stayed close to my tail.

After a few minutes of being followed, I saw a rest stop and decided to pull in. The police car did not follow me, he kept on driving. (I realize now that he was alerted to my vehicle by the first officer, started tailing me, then reported back to the first officer that I had pulled off the road.)

At the rest stop, I got out of the van and head into the bathroom. I glanced back at the van and saw a police car pull in behind the van. I wondered if they were there for me. That would be a strange coincidence. Then an officer got out of the car with a dog. They proceeded to circle my van.

I went back to the van and asked the officer if he had a warrant to search the van with his dog. He said that he was conducting an “open air” search and didn’t need a warrant. I’m sure this is true, as our 4th amendment rights have been eroded away by the Supreme Court. So I stood there and watched the dog sniff around my car. Four other police cars showed up. Now there were five police officers there watching the dog.

The officer put the dog back in the car and walked up to me. He told me that the dog got a “hit” on the van. I have heard this one before. He told me that he now had probable cause to search the van. I explained that the van has been searched by two other drug dogs and that they have found nothing. I told him that I understand it is common practice for police officers to claim that the K-9 has a hit in order to fake probable cause. I asked him to bring the dog out again and show me the dog’s action that indicate a hit. He told me to give him the keys.

Officer Lankford of the Indiana State Police (Badge #7565), a dog, and four other police officers spent the next hour tearing apart the Driving Equality van. They took apart film equipment, my dashboard, the lining of the van, opened the hood, took out the air-filter, and went through every personal item that I own. It was degrading. I sat on the bench and took pictures with my phone. The feeling of helplessness and powerlessness was torture. While the officers were searching the van, another cop went around to all the trash cans and looked through them for drugs I might have tried to stash. It was ridiculous.

I felt violated. I was violated. My 4th amendment rights were violated. Of course they found no drugs. I haven’t touch a drug in almost 4 years. I bought the van straight from the dealership. They cleaned it inside and out and then covered it with Amoral. When I got it home, I scrubbed it down as well. There are no drugs, traces of drugs, residues, or odors.

Eventually, they stopped looking. It was now 3:00AM. The officer pulled out my pill box and asked me what the pills were. I told him what medicines I was taking. He asked to see the prescription bottles. I got in the van and showed them to him. He was trying to find any reason to bust me. He was positive I smoked weed and did drugs.

I saw sitting in the back of the van, showing the office my prescription bottles when I heard a loud clunk. I looked up to see the bottom part of my dashboard missing. It broke off and all of my stuff was on the floor. I asked what had happened. He told me that the dog had broken the dashboard. (Interesting how he tried to make it look like it wasn’t broken, in hopes that I would drive away before it fell apart.) I told him that that was unacceptable. He said that he would give me a claim to file.

Then he told me that he had been hoping I would stop at the rest area so that he could search my van. He had wanted to search the van back when I was stopped, but because the other officer had given me my paperwork back, I was free to go.

I told him that I needed his name and badge number. He gave the information to me. Then I collected the identification of the other police officers on the scene. Officer Lankford went to his car to get me the paperwork I need to file a claim for my broken dashboard. Except that he didn’t have the paperwork in his car. He said that it was at the police station. It was now 3:30AM. We all got in our cars and I followed Officer Lankford 20 minutes down the road to the police station. We went inside and I got the paperwork.

Before I left, I looked him right in the eyes and told him that I was very disappointed in him. I said that we had a good conversation back at the traffic stop and when he asked if I had drugs in the car I told him the truth. When he asked if I had been arrested before, I told him the truth. But he decided to have me tailed for 20 minutes, and then jumped on the van when I pulled over at a rest stop. He then searched my vehicle for an hour, pulling apart the van. He even broke my dashboard.

He said that it was “his training” that taught him to look for signs when talking to a suspect. He said that something signaled him that I was hiding something. I asked him what it was that I did that signaled him. He said that he couldn’t tell me. I asked him how he felt about being wrong, and his dog being wrong. I asked him to apologize. I looked him right in the eye and told him that I was disappointed and that he needed to be more careful. He didn’t look at me. He said that he wasn’t wrong and didn’t do anything wrong.

After getting the paperwork and scolding the police officer (by the way, I had my dad, who is also my attorney, on the phone in my pocket this whole time incase anything happened) I took off down the highway.

I live in this van. Everything has its place. Living in such a small place, I have to keep it clean and organized or else I’d be breaking things and going crazy. Now I have a broken dashboard, and everything that was in the center console is in a pile on the floor. (Actually, I just tried to duct tape it back together and put everything back in the console, but as I’m writing this it all came crashing down again.)

I am going to file the paperwork to be reimbursed for the dashboard, after I pay to have it fixed so that I can sell the van when I return. Hopefully the state of Indiana will reimburse me. I took pictures. I am also filling a complaint against Officer Lankford, who conduced an unwarranted search of my vehicle.

I am concerned that I was targeted by Officer Lankford after our conversation about gay rights and the Driving Equality project. His actions are unacceptable. This kind of discrimination is exactly what I devote my life to stopping. I will use this as a learning experience.

This trip has been amazing and incredibly positive. The only sore spot has been the illegal searches. They are degrading. They make me disappointed that America is not all it should be. But I’ll keep working on it.

UPDATE: I am in Kalamazoo, Michigan today. I visited the local police department and asked the K-9 unit to perform a search of the van using the drug dog. I believe that Indiana State Police Officer Lankford was lying when he said that his dog got a “positive hit” on my van. I wanted to prove it.

The Kalamazoo K-9 did conducted the same exact search of my vehicle that the Indiana State Police did. He ran the dog along the perimeter of my van, circling three times. The dog smelled all over the vehicle, climbing underneath, and jumping up to sniff the engine.

Exactly ONE day after the Indiana State Police’s drug dog supposedly got a positive hit on my vehicle, the Kalamzoo drug dog found NO drugs, scent, trace, residue, or evidence of drugs in my vehicle. This backs up my assertion that the Indiana State Police K-9 did NOT get a “positive hit” on my van, but rather, Officer Lankford, lied about the dog smelling drugs in order to establish probable cause to search my vehicle. This is illegal and a blatant violation of my 4th amendment rights.

Why, if there was no indication of drugs in my vehicle, did Officer Lankford and four other police officers tear apart my van? I believe it is because of the conversation I had earlier in the night with Officer Lankford. He knew I am a gay activist from Massachusetts working on a project to promote gay rights. He knew I was on my way to South Bend, Indiana to conduct an interview for the project. I believe I was the target of anti-gay harassment by Officer Lankford and the Indiana State Police.

Below if a video clip of the Kalamazoo Police K-9 unit doing the same search that the Indiana State Police did yesterday. The Kalamazoo K-9 finds no drugs, scent, trace, residue, or evidence of drugs. After the video the, officer tells me that there is no scent of any drugs in my van and that if the dog had gotten even a trace of drugs, he would have reacted, indicating a “positive hit”.

If you like what we are doing, please help us continue the project by making a contribution.

Click on photographs for larger versions.

Day 101

I was in Chicago today to interview Rick Garcia from Equality Illinois. We talked about the climate for LGBT folks in the prairie state. Equality Illinois has been able to defeat the anti-gay marriage amendment every time it comes up in the legislature. The pro-discrimination folks have been trying to pass an amendment since 1996.

Chicago is a very progressive city and a great place for LGBT folks. The state of Illinois also protects gays and lesbians from workplace discrimination. Equality Illinois is currently working on a bill that would give same-sex couples relationship recognition.

Since we were in Chicago, I took the opportunity to ask Rick how he felt about President Obama’s handling of LGBT rights on a federal level. Rick knows Barack Obama personally. He worked with him on LGBT legislation when Obama was in the state legislature. Rick believes that the president really does care about equality for LGBT folks and has all the right intentions. Yet he has surrounded himself with advisors who still believe that being pro-LGBT is a dangerous political move and that he should be hesitant.

Rick told me that while he supports president Obama, we must also keep pushing him to do the right thing. We can support the president and demand our rights at the same time. We must call Obama out when he is wrong and hold him to his promise of full equality for all.

After the interview I hung out in Chicago’s Boystown for a while. I like this city.

Again, I’m trying to post a video clip of the interview, but my computer is not feeling it. You can help out the Driving Equality project by donating to the New Computer Fund. I need to raise $1700 more to purchase the computer. This computer will be used to edit the final documentary.

Day 100

It is day 100! Woah! 100 days on the road. What a trip so far. Thanks to everyone who has contributed to make the project happen!

Today I conducted an interview with Katie Belanger, the executive director of Fair Wisconsin. She told me about the legal protections afforded to LGBT people in the state. Wisconsin was the first state to pass a gay civil rights law, protecting gays and lesbians from workplace discrimination, back in 1982!

Wisconsin voters passed an anti-gay constitutional amendment in 2006. This amendment bans civil unions as well as gay marriage. It is being challenged in court right now. State law does not permit two issues to be lumped into one amendment.

Pro-LGBT lawyers are arguing that marriage and civil unions are two separate issues and, while the voters may have voted against same-sex marriage, they may very well have thrown out an amendment banning civil unions. This is likely, as polls indicate folks are more in favor of civil unions than marriage for gay couples.

The Wisconsin legislature recently passed a domestic partnership law, giving same-sex couples a few relationship recognition rights. This new law is being challenged by the anti-gay organizations. They claim that the amendment passed in 2006 banning marriage and anything close to it, does not allow for domestic partnerships. Fair Wisconsin argues that domestic partnerships are not anything close to marriage.

When the anti-gay organizations were pushing for the anti-gay marriage amendment, they said it was to “protect marriage”. All the focus was on marriage. Why them, are they using the law to attack domestic partnerships? This shows, again, that it is NOT about the word “marriage” as they claim all across the country. These folks do not want gays and lesbians to have any relationship recognition, whether it be called marriage, civil unions, domestic partnerships, or any other name. They are not protecting marriage, but instead, blatantly discrimination against gays and lesbians.

After the interview I ate cheese curds. I like Wisconsin. I love Madison.

I’m trying to post a video clip of the interview, but my computer is not feeling it. You can help out the Driving Equality project by donating to the New Computer Fund. I need to raise $1700 more to purchase the computer. This computer will be used to edit the final documentary.

Day 99

I’m in Madison, Wisconsin. This is a very cool city. I spent the day trying to upload, editing, and post videos. I also got a chance to take a quick swim. Downtown Madison is surrounded by lakes on both sides, yet I was the only one swimming today. Seriously, I never saw anybody else in the water all day. It made me think that maybe the water is bad or something, but oh well. It could have also been because it was a grey day, raining on and off. Ha! That doesn’t bother me!

My computer is about to die. It is kind of sad, but at least it made it this far. Today was incredibly frustrating, as video after video just would not work on my computer. And the clips that did work were not editable in the way I would have liked. That is why some of the sound is not aligned to the video. I’m kind of bummed. Isis, my computer, and I have traveled the country together and brought you video clips and photos from nearly 50 interviews. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to post any more video clips of the interviews, but I will try.

If you want to be the #1 Driving Equality fan, make me incredibly happy, and make the ultimate contribution to the project, (I’ll need a new computer to edit the film), please help me purchase a new MacBook Pro.

15-inch: 2.8GHz

Intel Core 2 Duo
4GB Memory
500GB hard drive
Built-in 7-hour battery
NVIDIA GeForce 9400M + 9600M GT with 512MB
Ships: Within 24hrs

$2,299.00

Click here to contribute to the New Computer Fund. (hey, it’s worth a shot, right?)

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Today is day 99! Please enjoy:

Day 98

This morning I was in Des Moines, Iowa to interview Sandy Vopalka. She is an amazing activist and has been fighting for our community for 30 years. She founded Equality Iowa many years ago. She helped pushed the state legislature to pass a fully-inclusive employment and housing non-discrimination law.

Sandy is now running The Center, a place for LGBT folks in Des Moines. Her mission is now, and always has been, to make every member of the LGBT community feel welcome. She is doing incredible work. I admire her passion and her commitment to inclusivity.

After meeting with Sandy I sped through Iowa to get to a kiss-in in Iowa City. There were kiss-ins in over 50 cities across the country to protest the treatment of the two boys in Utah who were arrested for kissing. The event in Iowa City was small but spirited. The folks I met, including Bridget, who organized the event, were awesome! This seems like a really cool city.

At 1:00 the couples stood in the big chalk heart on the sidewalk and kissed. It was lovely. I wish I had a boy to kiss though. I will try to post the video tomorrow. My computer is being a real pain. (Woops, the clip of the interview with Sandy didn’t work either. I’ll keep trying…)

If you like what we are doing, please help us continue the project by making a contribution.

Day 97

In Nebraska I interviewed Michael Gordon. He is the Executive Director of Citizens for Equal Protection. Michael and I talked about the lack of rights for LGBT people in this state. There are not workplace or housing protections, no adoption rights, no foster-care rights, and of course gay couples are not allowed to marry…or enter in a civil union…or a domestic partnership. Nebraska was actually the first state to amend their constitution to ban same-sex marriage. Their amendment not only outlawed gay marriage, but any kind of relationship recognition for same-sex couples.

Yet, Michael has been working hard and has managed to help pass a few pieces of pro-LGBT legislation. Couples in Nebraska can designate who they want to handle their funeral arrangements. This is important for same-sex couples who cannot marry. Michael told me the story of a lesbian couple that he was friends with. One of the partners passedaway recently. The other partner went to the funeral home to make the arrangement. However, the woman’s next of kin was there to take over and was going to push her partner out of the picture. The funeral director was going to have the woman escorted out by police! But the two women had filed the funeral-rights paperwork. Still, the partner had to call the ACLU, who called the governor’s office, who put an aide of the phone to explain to the funeral director that the lesbian partner had the final say in the arrangements.

Nebraska has a long way to go. But Omaha is a great city. It actually peeled away one of the states electoral votes and turned it blue for Barack Obama!

The interesting thing about Omaha is that it is right next to Iowa. When you cross the river into Council Bluffs, your citizenship status raises a few points. You can legally marry and you are protected under employment and housing legislation.

After my interview in Nebraska, I crossed into Iowa to interview Mike and Hersh, a legally married same-sex couple. They have been together for nearly 30 years and can finally marry now that the Iowa Supreme Court unanimously decided that discriminating against same-sex couples is unlawful.

Mike told me about his legal-limbo situation. He lives, and is married, in Iowa, but works in Nebraska. When he crosses the river, 10 minutes from his house, into Nebraska, his legal relationship dissolves. He has specifically told his employer that, if anything should happen to him while at work, make sure the ambulance takes him to a hospital in Iowa so that his husband can be there and will have the authority to make decisions about his care.

This was a great interview. I edited together a nice clip, but my computer is dying and won’t let me save it. (Click here to contribute to the New Computer Fund.)

If you like what we are doing, please help us continue the project by making a contribution.

Day 96

After leaving Fargo, North Dakota, I headed toward Grand Rapids, Minnesota. (The hometown of Judy Garland.) There I met with some great folks who are doing the work to promote equality in northern Minnesota. This is not the liberal city Minneapolis. Currently there is a debate in the local paper. Letters-to-the-editor are flying. The argument is not over gay marriage or if LGBTs deserve rights, but whether or not homosexuality itself is allowable.

There is a medical doctor in town who has taken a hard stance against homosexuality. He uses religion as his basis for stating that gays and lesbians are sick and need to change. My new friend Andy Mundt used to see this doctor when he was younger. After Andy came out, the doctor tried to help him find a “cure” and asked if he wanted ex-gay literature. Andy knew he wasn’t sick and started seeing a different doctor. That is when he learned that his old doctor had marked on his chart that Andy was sick, suffering from homosexuality. Andy is now the President of Itasca GLBTA Alliance. Check out a clip of our interview below.

I also interviewed Ashley Rantala. She lives in Hibbing, Minnesota, part of the Iron Range. The Iron Range is a series of towns that are grouped together because of their main export; iron. This part of the country is not the most welcoming place for gays and lesbians. She started a group for LGBT folks living in the Iron Range. She fields phone calls from closeted community members looking for help. Ashley proudly wears her rainbow neckless in town. One day she was in a gas station when the boy behind the counter saw the neckless and reached out to her for help. He is gay, in the closet, and was close to suicide. Ashley was able to be there for him when he needed someone to talk.

I hung out in Grand Rapids until 3:00AM and then drove a few hours toward Omaha, Nebraska. Today I woke up around noon and continued driving the rest of the nine hours to my next destination. I just arrived in Nebraska and am camping near a lake.

Throughout the country, I have tried to get a more even feel of the state of our LGBT community by meeting people in small towns as well as big cities. If I had more time I would travel to every part of every state, but that is not possible. Of course I conduct interview in big cities, but I also find it incredibly important to talk with folks in small towns to get a better idea of what life in America is like for LGBT people.

I live in the extremely gay friendly city of Cambridge, Massachusetts. But that is not where I grew up. I was born and raised in the central part of the state, far away from the big city. The town I grew up in has less than 10,000 people, didn’t have a stoplight until I was older, and my high school class was about 80 students. I know what it is like to be from a small town. I love Lunenburg, but I understand that it can be hard for LGBT folks to feel safe and welcomed in a rural community.

The number one thing that I had, and still have today, going for me, is my parents. A lot of kids from rural America don’t have the support of their parents. I always have, and am realizing more and more everyday that I travel through this country and meet folks who have different stories, just how lucky I am.

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(Sorry for the audio not being alligned with the video. My computer is dying. Click here to contribute to the New Computer Fund.)